I saw Chris Weaver yesterday on the TV playing for the team that isn't Alien Iverson anymore. He just stood there and sometimes he would get the ball and would look around the court wondering, "Where's Alien Iverson?" Then his mind would turn on the stove and start the dinner meal and he'd remember, "Alien Iverson isn't here anymore." About this time, after all the thoughts of Chris Weaver's head, the shooting clock would be ticking down. Chris Weaver is still holding the ball, "Time to shoot at the hoopnet," he would say and would then do the shooting that he said he was going to do which resulted in the ball going in the air and either hitting the rim ring or the flatboard, but never both.
The strange music that sometimes plays in my head when I have a good thought just got turned on under my hair. Chris Weaver must think that his life is not the greatest and complaints to the governing board in heaven who hear from distressed minds may soon hear from Chris Weaver. No one wants Chris Weaver. It shows that Chris Weaver is not the one in charge of the happy Kool-ade at the party of life. Chris Weaver thinks, "I'd really like to go somewhere, but there ain't nowhere to go because I have no friends and no one ever invites me to go or sends their friends in exchange for me."
Mr. Weaver doesn't understand that no one ever invites him to birthday celebrations not because the cake is too small, but because no one wants to pay someone 20 million to come hang out if that person is just going to stand around holding the ball.
Adonalgland use to think like Chris Weaver. He thought no one liked him and that his body had odor and that he would never be invited to parties. The truth is that Adonalgland isn't that good and will never be invited to very good parties, but people know his smile and they know that even though he doesn't make the happy kool-ade mix of life he is responsible for hiding funny jokes and pictures in the paper and people like adonalgland for that. He also likes sneaking toys into cereal boxes like the time he put a hand ful of monopoly board pieces in the fruit loops.