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America's Next Biggest Warrior Fan Contest: 2nd Place

It's time for the top 3 essays in the Golden State of Mind essay contest, "America's Next Biggest Golden State Warrior Fan." In total, we received 9 entries and to give every one of our entrants their props and due time in the spotlight, we're going to post their essays in full in their own separate posts. We want to extend a special thank you to all of our entrants. Reading your essays was a blast and we enjoyed each and every one of them.

Here's our 2nd place winner, ORthey.

I've been asked it time and again
By coworkers, family, and friends
Though they vary by age and by name
Each time, their question's the same:

"Dear Bret, why do you persist
On backing a team that has missed
The playoffs for so many years?
Oh, how do you deal with the tears?"

Each time, I breathe deep and pause,
I relax my mind and my jaws.
Deep down in my heart's where I reach
To pull out my time-tested speech:

While other fans may have the titles
And many think winning is vital
There's a few things those fans don't know
About loving your home team so

What other team shells out the green
To a player whose stats are obscene?
Just look at Foyle's career numbers
And try to successfully slumber

If you think that makes me jaded
What other team's so often traded
Their best draft picks so many times?
In some states, that counts as a crime!

Before thoroughly judging this team
As the bumbling fools that they seem
Let's look at the on-court performance
Of these perennial NBA doormats:

It practically makes me unconscious
To think of the 3's this team launches
It practically drives me insane
The way that they won't drive the lane

It knocks me way down to my knees
They way they refuse to play D
It's so dang hard to stand up tall
When they keeping turning over the ball

At this point, my friends look at me
They stare me puzzlingly
As if to say, Bret, are you crazy?
Has your mind gone from clear to hazy?

But the thing that these people don't know
The thing that will gladden me so:
Not front office, nor coach, nor the game:
It's that I know it'll keep bein' the same!

We'll be awful again this season
But that, my friends, is no reason
To fret, it is nothing to fear
`Cuz we're consistent year after year!

GSoM Comments
  • Couldn?t have said it better myself
  • Clever. Nice poem and does a good job of saying despite all the problems still a fan.
  • Poetic Justice for Warriors fans
  • Speechless. Those rhymes were so sick someone should produce a beat for you Orthey! Bonus point for rhyming unconscious with launches.
Orthey came creative by mixing in his Warrior misery and loyalty into a poem. Jessica, let him know what he's won.

"A 12-inch Thunder Doll!"


Previous Essays

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