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NBA Playoffs 2016: Draymond Green stares into a deep, dark void during postgame press conference

After a thrilling win, Draymond stared into an endless abyss as Festus Ezeli droned on next to him.

Ezra Shaw/Getty Images

The Golden State Warriors came back from a seemingly insurmountable deficit last night, as they hustled and gutted their way to a 110-99 win over the Portland Trail Blazers. Draymond Green led the charge. He kicked ass, took names, and dominated the Blazers throughout the course of the fourth quarter. His defensive tenacity (and his ruthlessness) enabled the Warriors to outscore the Blazers 34-12 in the final frame.

Other writers here at GSOM will tell you exactly how Draymond and Festus led the defensive charge. Or, other writers will bring you inside the locker room, dropping quotes and insider knowledge.

Me? I'm here to ask simple questions. I'm here to lighten the mood. I'm here to dive into the cracks.


Did Mothra, the evil Moth who (duh) controls our hearts and minds start uploading specific instructions for world domination?

Did a space/time continuum rip open the fabric of the air surrounding him and he somehow fell into an endless tunnel of revelation?

Did he re-create this scene from Contact?

If he was wearing a camcorder headset, would it register 18 hours of static?

By my count, I've got him incapacitated for a little over 22 seconds. 22 seconds is enough time for Usain Bolt to run 200 meters. Or for the history of math class to be explained. Or for a high school kid to lose his...umm... Anyways...

Draymond didn't reboot until Festus said his name. Then, he tried to casually play it off. Play it off like he hadn't just seen the face of God, or the coming of the robot revolution, or the end of all time.

We are on to you Draymond.

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