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This Week in Weaponized Joy: Curry and Durant’s fourth quarter bombs

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Steph Curry daggers Trae Young, Durant lights up Kawhi Leonard, and Zaza Pachulia shows the champs love

NBA: Chicago Bulls at Golden State Warriors Cary Edmondson-USA TODAY Sports

Ah yes, there’s nothing like “Weaponized Joy”.

It is the fuel of the Golden State Warriors dynasty, the warp drive for the starship USS Enterprise, the first cup of rum-spiked eggnog at the holiday party, the rush of excitement every retail worker feels in December when the doors lock at closing time and they can finally cut that nauseating holiday music off.

In this week’s chapter, we reflect on the Warriors overcoming two tough losses in Toronto and Detroit to finish with a strong win over the Atlanta Hawks. We even have the return of “Unanimous”, Stephen Curry!

Let’s get to it.


“Tell Em Don’t Waste My Time”/ Curry gets a headshot on Trae Young

Stephen Curry incinerates his alleged clone Trae Young with a deep bomb to punctuate the blowout.

Why this should be #1: Curry has spent his entire career shrugging off naysayers and destroying obstacles. Folks said he could never lead a team to a championship because he was an undersized jump shooter.

Two MVP’s and three rings later, he has proven them all to be blind fools. He perfected the art of shooting from anywhere, at anytime, on anybody.

His arduous journey from dismissed little guy to hall-of-fame level transformational talent has spawned many copycats. Curry changed basketball forever, inspiring everyone from children to 7-foot centers to throw up shots from beyond the arc

So you can imagine his annoyance that people will not stop comparing him to diminutive rookie Trae Young, a kid who went 0-for-5 from three-point range against the Warriors.

With the champs up 116-95 late in the fourth quarter, Curry knew that his humble coach Steve Kerr was due to yank him keep from running the score up. That meant that he would have to get a quick shot off before the next stoppage of play got him subbed out. As he dribbled down the court, he darted his eyes to his peripherals, as if he was looking for a pass.

Young, already covered in BBQ sauce from Curry’s hot night, relaxed momentarily. Curry immediately shot a quick glance down to where Young’s feet were, and saw the tiniest window to get a deep, rushed jumper up...directly in Young’s face.

BANG! I love this clip. As Curry trots back, you can see the Warriors bench standing up in awe of how gold-blooded that move was. Curry starts laughing, and you can see actor Chris Tucker staring mesmerized with stunned admiration.

We can’t compare Young to Curry yet. Much like half-cooked bacon, Young just isn’t quite ready. Maybe that’s why Curry PUT HIS ASS IN THE SKILLET!


“Reunited and it Feels So Good/ Zaza checks in on the champs in Detroit

Zaza Pachulia spreads good vibes to his former teammates.

You gotta vote this #1 because: The Warriors players interacted with former Warrior and two-time champion Zaza Pachulia with childlike playfulness and sincere gratitude.

There would be no joy to weaponize without the tight brotherhood the Warriors share with each other. Zaza won two titles with Golden State because his of unselfishness and heart, and it’s clear his teammates still feed off of him until this very day. We miss you Zaza!


“Cold Blooded”/KD sends Toronto into shock with clutch bomb over Kawhi Leonard

Kevin Durant scores 51 and brings Warriors back from deep deficit to send game into overtime in Toronto over arguably the best defender in the league, Kawhi Leonard.

You need to vote this #1 because: The weird thing about this was Durant had just missed a huge free throw in the final minutes of the game. He answered that slipup by drilling two back-to-back triples to send the game into OT.

It was the second three-pointer though that made the world stop. Leonard, a former defensive player of the year nicknamed man “The Klaw” was on KD like white on rice. Leonard’s biggest skill is his defense, and he is a ballhawking terror with freakishly long limbs and dangerously tight cornrows. He’s also in a deadlock with KD for being the #2 small-forward behind LeBron in many pundits eyes.

KD was more focused about Leonard’s eyes though; he planned on putting them out with a face melting dagger from the corner with time winding down. Look how nonchalantly this 7-foot scoring machine dribbles beyond the arc and activates “Slim Reaper” mode, nearly ripping the souls out of every Raptors affiliated human being in Canada.

That Rick James tattoo on KD’s leg must have shouted “COOOOLLLDDDD BLOOOODDEED” as the shot went through.

Unfortunately, the shorthanded Warriors couldn’t finish the job in OT or this shot would have even more mythos surrounding it.


Poll

Which Warrior weaponized the most joy this week?

This poll is closed

  • 26%
    Curry daggers Trae Young
    (36 votes)
  • 32%
    Zaza reunites with the champs
    (43 votes)
  • 41%
    KD bombs on Kawhi to go to OT
    (55 votes)
134 votes total Vote Now