NBA 2K19 Ratings Sneak Peek: The Warriors Are completely unstoppable

OMG.

NBA 2K19 STARTER RATINGS ARE BEING REVEALED!!!

This is a major sneak peek before the most popular basketball video game series of the modern era is released on September 9th, 2018. In case you’re too lazy to view the video (which, judging from the clip, was presumably filmed on somebody’s Motorola Razr), I’ve got your back, baby. Here are the 2K ratings for your “Bada Bing”-era, world champion, Golden State Warriors.

• Stephen Curry 95
• Klay Thompson 89
• Kevin Durant 97
• Draymond Green 87
• DeMarcus Cousins 90

Now as an Oakland native and fan of basketball video games since the “Bulls vs Lakers” game on Sega Genesis, I am overwhelmed with gold-blooded anticipation. Of course, the team was damn near unbeatable online even in the Splash Bros/pre-KD days. When we got the “Slim Reaper”, the team became the Final Boss of 2k. But even still, any smart opposing player could mitigate the virtual Warriors’ potential by abusing our specialist-type centers, like Zaza Pachulia, or JaVale McGee.

But with the addition of “Big Cuz”, both the 2K and real life Warriors have an all-world low post monster that hasn’t been seen in a Warriors uni since the days of.....WILT CHAMBERLAIN?! Cousins is rated a 90, above the three-time champions and Olympic Gold medalists Thompson and Green!

As soon as I got the news, I began sinisterly speed-dialing fellow 2K aficionados of the immortal Dub Nation to share the glorious news. I had the foresight to record the interaction for your viewing pleasure:

For reference, here are the ratings for the 1986-1987 “ShowTime” Lakers ratings from the last NBA2K:

• Magic Johnson 98
• Kareem Abdul-Jabbar 93
• Michael Cooper 86
• James Worthy 85
• Byron Scott 84

Or even the 1995-1996 “72-win” Chicago Bulls ratings from last year:

• Michael Jordan 99
• Scottie Pippen 93
• Dennis Rodman 86
• Toni Kukoc 80
• Ron Harper 78

According to the 2K calculations, the current iteration Dubs are better than the historic dynasties of yesteryear. WOW.

Now...I wanna talk to the serious gamers only here. Everyone else, feel free to return to your normal web browsing; I’m sure AOL has something pertinent on their homepage for you to grumble about.

Back to my gamers; there’s something you should know. I’m hella good at NBA2K. I’ve been playing with the Warriors and killing friends, neighbors, and online jabronis for over a decade. I made 2008 Jamal Crawford look like Michael Jordan in 2K. So you can imagine my glee when the Warriors ownership decided to actually make the team good, creating a domino effect wherein the virtual Dubs were more than random scrap pieces.

In 2K18, I took it upon myself to see if I could take the Dubs and match or beat the 73-9 record the 2015-2016 era Warriors put up. Here are the results:

Daniel “GoldBloodedKing” Hardee

It took all I had to equal the real life regular season record in a damn video game. We really don’t give that 73-win team enough credit. Also, I started getting addicted to making opponent’s rage quit during the middle of a game because I was hitting preposterous daggers with Curry, Thompson, or Durant. This motivated me to see just how deadly I could be using the power of the Golden Dynasty. Viewer discretion is advised....

171-18 record with the 2017-2018 Warriors, with an extra seven victories with the Warriors All-Time roster. #COMEGETSOME (Side note, Wilt Chamberlain as an All-Time Warrior is unfair with the Splash Bros, KD, and Rick Barry).

I’m looking forward to what I can do with the “Big 5” Dubs in 2k19, and if you bleed blue-and-gold, and own a current-gen video game console, and also have a high speed internet connection that isn’t trash, YOU SHOULD BE SALIVATING TOO.

P.S. If you want to check out a text version of all of the starting lineups, Complex has you covered.

P.P.S. If you’re a member of Dub Nation and someone cries about you picking what amounts to effectively an Olympic team, respond to them the same way Cousins and Curry would.

Add me on PSN @TheBlackTruth! #CANTWAIT